“Unconscious of your story, you are in its grasp; but with consciousness, an alchemical process begins: The solidity of the complex dissolves and you can open up to the arrival of a new archetype, the birth of a new cycle of life. In the shadow, then, lies our myth and our fate.”
-Connie Zweig
Here we go again: another new moon. A repeated thing, and yet it is new every time. Like the breath, or a sun salutation, we seem to be doing the same thing over and over again, but things are different; and you are different, more importantly. New moons are a good time to set intentions before the building energy of a waxing moon brings those intentions to life. On a new moon, we can sit in that momentary darkness and, rather than drown in deep black, reflect on our inner light which is so subtle that it most visible in the shadows.
What’s your inner light? After a day of chasing my daughter around trying to get her dressed, telling her 20 times to brush her teeth, coaxing her to eat so that she doesn’t crash in a haingry tantrum later on...it’s hard to think of my inner light. It’s hard when I feel the stress of how cumbersome every little mundane task becomes with a 3-year-old who, paradoxically, wants to help and independent at the same time she still wants me to do so much for her.
It’s a story I tell myself: I am her mom, she is my little girl. She is generally a ‘good girl’ that has emotional breakdowns when she’s tired, hungry, or frustrated. And I am usually a ‘good mom’ until I am so tired that I snap at her for something as silly as not wanting to put a shirt on under her jacket. Then sometimes I fall into that trap of thinking I’m a ‘bad mom’ just because I’m not perfectly calm in every situation. Then I remember, beyond being a mom, I am a woman and beyond that, I am human, and from an even more expanded view, I am that inner light that we all are when we’re at our best.
The reality is, sometimes I’m a tired mom, a happy mom, a stressed mom, a calm mom, a frustrated mom, a creative mom, a lazy mom. I pass through all those phases, like the moon. It’s the same when my daughter can go from crying and screaming because she doesn’t want to brush her teeth, to happy and laughing when we read stories at night. I find that the more I let myself flow with my moods and emotions, the easier it is to be more compassionate and accepting of hers.
It’s the little things that can pull us down, and sometimes the little things that can lift us back up. A smile, a hug, a good memory, a hot cup of tea or coffee, a chat with a friend. Sometimes we need those little gestures of compassion and other times, others need that from us. But if you’re like me, you won’t necessarily know you need it until later when you reflect on your emotions after the moment.
But the more I dedicate time each day for yoga practice, no matter how brief, the more I notice my emotions in the moment. Five minutes moving on the yoga mat, or three minutes just sitting and breathing each day recalibrates my mind so that it’s easier to slow down and notice my feelings in each passing moment. Once a day is good, twice a day (morning and evening) is even better.
Last night, instead of doing yoga on my mat, I did yoga nidra because I realized I was tired. Sometimes hitting my internal reset button means doing something I don’t do everyday, like yoga nidra, which I usually reserve for days when my energy is low. Then again, sometimes resetting comes from a steady daily practice, a repetitive sequence that I tweak each time according to my energy, mood, and the general context of my day. Whatever form my practice takes each day, I always include at least a moment with my eyes closed and in that darkness behind my eyelids I give myself a much needed moment to find that light shining inside that keeps me inspired each day.
So my new moon intention this time around: 5 minutes of yoga practice on my mat in the morning and the evening and 5 or more minutes of reading from something inspirational before bed. I can do more if I want on any given day, but at least that minimum amount feels attainable. What’s your new moon intention? Any inspirational reading material that you can suggest for me, or any others reading this post?
Here’s a short flow that can be done in a minute or two when that’s all the time you have. It’s refreshing and if your body doesn’t feel like dealing with precise alignments or long, deep holds in any posture, this is the perfect way to hit your reset button when you need a break.