“I want to stand as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge, you see all kinds of you can’t see from the center.”
- Kurt Vonnegut
A couple weeks ago I talked about habits and how they are more powerful than goal setting. Now comes the challenge of staying power. One of the things that yoga has taught me is how to exercise my endurance without creating more tension. If you’ve been to a yoga class recently, you might have heard a teacher talking about ‘finding your edge.’ One of the yoga sutras comes to mind here: sthira sukham asanam, which means posture is steady and easeful. In other words, poise in the midst of challenge and difficulty.
Moms know all about their edge. It starts with the changes and discomforts of menstruating, evolves with the experience of being pregnant, climaxes at the milestone of giving birth, unfolds in the relentless ‘fourth trimester’ as we get a crash course in mothering, and continues as our kids grow and develop and try to push us over our edge all the time.
I find that I am more likely to get pushed over my edge by my daughter - and by life circumstances in general - if I don’t spend enough time on my mat playing with that edge. A yoga mat can be a laboratory for life if we practice with intention and awareness. I have a deep need to release my stress through a physical practice, which is what has kept me so close to yoga. For the same reason, I’ve loved bike riding, running, dancing, hiking, and capoeira. After all, it’s not so easy to flip your lid when you’re happily worn out by a form of exercise that burns off your anxiety.
So let’s play with that edge. This week’s video just gives a few ideas on how to do that, but it’s really just the tip of the iceberg. Some of you might find the poses very easy or familiar and therefore have a hard time finding your edge within them. If that’s the case, find your edge with the breath: how deeply and slowly can you breathe as you hold a posture you think of as easy? Sometimes the posture is easy physically, but there is a lot going on within you mentally and emotionally; that is also part of your edge. Another aspect of this is that on a different day, that same posture might not feel easy; or perhaps holding the posture for longer brings you to your edge.
Another way to work with your edge is to check in with yourself throughout the day. If you find yourself in a moment of frustration, stress, or impatience, that is also a type of edge: mental or emotional. Take that as a cue to find time on your yoga mat to release tension by creating space for yourself to breathe and explore that edge.
I like the Vonnegut quote above and I think it’s often true, but I’d like to add that after I’ve been to the edge, I find it useful to retreat back to ‘my center’ to close my eyes and regroup. After all, the edge wouldn’t be an edge without the center and vice versa.